Do you ever stop and think about where you were when you first started homesteading or when you first got married? Not like where you were physically. More like mentally. If you’re anything like me, you’ve come a pretty long way from where you initially started.
I think back to the first days of our marriage and the stress I would get from simple tasks like scrubbing the bathrooms and making sure the house was swept or just figuring out a way I could provide some type of worth to our household. Because in our household, Husband does most all of the cooking and the laundry and the dishes. I know. You don’t have to tell me. He’s almost perfect, and I am incredibly blessed. (I’m in charge of the bathrooms still though. 🤣) It took me a long time to figure out what I could do to be a contributing member of our household, but gradually, I found a role for myself. Homemaker. (And landscaper! I love to mow.) I still have a career outside of the home, but I think homemaker suits me just fine.
So, what is a homemaker? It’s many things really, but the definition is…
1 a person, especially a housewife, who manages a home.
Manages a home. Okay, that’s pretty self-explanatory, but what about the “maker”? In my mind, homemaking is not the same as housewife or housekeeping. Why? Because in homemaking, you’re not just managing a house, you’re making a home. It took me a minute in the beginning of our marriage to understand this, but once I did, I felt like I was finally an active contributor to our household.
- You’re creating a comfy place where your family feels safe. Comfort comes in many forms, but all of the tiny details make your home comfortable as a whole.
- You’re nurturing and tending to whatever needs love and care whether it is your children and dogs and cats or the room that needs a facelift and the garden that could use some flowers.
- You’re using your strengths and working on your weaknesses to produce things that are tangible, like canned jams, and intangible, like the feelings felt from a simple “I love you.”
There are times when you’re not up for the job, and hopefully your partner will help fill in those areas or days. There are days when I plop down to read a book instead of dehydrating something or cleaning the house, knowing that both need to be done. There are other days when I’m doing 50 things at any one time and don’t even think about taking a moment to relax. I’ve had people ask me what I actually do in our home because from the outside, it looks like Husband does 90%. I don’t know how to respond to those people. Because from the inside, I can’t tell you how many times Husband has quietly thanked me for keeping our home running smoothly, for preserving our fruits and vegetables from the garden, for handling all of our livestock supplies and deliveries, for making our house a home.
Homemakers are always learning new techniques and skills and are always trying new things or maintaining old ones. There is absolutely no shame in homemaking. We deeply love, wholeheartedly care and graciously accept our roles. We are productive, contributing members of our household, and our family and their comfort and happiness is our number one priority. Homemaker is one of the most honorary titles you can have, I think, and I proudly accept it as my role in our household. Anyone can live in and manage a house. Not everyone can make a house a home.
What do you think makes a homemaker?